


Strategic Uses of Sex Pollen

by slotumn



Series: ClauLysi Kinkwhenever [1]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Aphrodisiacs, Attempt at Humor, Byleth's Galaxy Brained Matchmaking Methods, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fingerfucking, Hand Jobs, Multiple Orgasms, Mutual Masturbation, Overstimulation, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sex Pollen, Vaginal Fingering, no beta we die like Glenn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 04:13:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22867663
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slotumn/pseuds/slotumn
Summary: "...You're real, right?""No, this is Claude's ghost. He died back there fighting beasts and came back to haunt you while you were, uh, having some alone time.""Nevermind, you're definitely real."A.K.A. Claude and Lysithea feat. sex pollens.
Relationships: Lysithea von Ordelia/Claude von Riegan
Series: ClauLysi Kinkwhenever [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1644289
Kudos: 53





	Strategic Uses of Sex Pollen

"--And, that's the last of them."

A massive beast fell to the ground, sending debris flying around the area. Thankfully, the two people who delivered the final blow were safely out of the area by then, as other footsoldiers searched for various materials. 

"Are you okay, Lysithea? That thing's last attack hit you, didn't it."

"I'm fine, Claude. And it hit you, too, so maybe you should worry about yourself first instead of treating me like a--"

"--child, got it."

He examined the strange powder, released by the beast, on his sleeves. The substance was pale, yellowish, and a little bit sweet-smelling, kind of like pollen, and not like any poisons often secreted by these types of beasts. 

He had to wonder what exactly was the purpose of releasing something like this alongside an attack. 

"Everyone, let's go."

But before he could go down that line of thought in much detail, Byleth called out and gathered all the troops to return to the monastery.

"...At least it doesn't look harmful."

\---

When he later looked up information about the beast in his room, just in case, he learned that the pollen indeed wasn't harmful-- at least not in the sense that it could cause death or illness. 

But it did cause intense sexual arousal (which he didn't need a book to tell), as the beast in question hunted prey by literally making them too horny to run away. 

There wasn't a "cure" for it, really, aside from beating some out and/or waiting for the effects to fade by itself-- and after the third round of doing the former, he was still hard as a rock. (Apparently the pollen had an effect of just straight up removing refractory periods as well.)

I'm going to be awfully tired tomorrow, he thought, but began preparing for another one in hopes the effects would pass faster. 

And the subject of his daydreams (eveningdreams?) to aid the process was, once again--

"Lysithea..."

Under normal circumstances, fantasizing about her so blatantly would have made him feel kind of bad, but at the moment, he was too horny for guilt. He'd already gone through all his usual scenarios involving her, however, so he was going to have to get creative on the next one. Perhaps an Almyran variant of the one with the dancer outfit...

Then he remembered. 

He wasn't the only one hit by the powders earlier.

"She...must also..."

The thought that popped up in his head next was certified insanity, but it was evening, and almost everyone was at the dining hall, so the chances of being spotted with a raging hard-on was...low enough, he decided. 

(It could even go down to zero with some clever tucking into the waistband.)

Surely nothing was wrong with simply going to check if she was okay, right...?

\---

"Hey, Lysithea? You in there?"

No reply. 

"Just wanted to check whether you were okay. From earlier, y'kn--"

Before he could finish the sentence, his brain short-circuited from three things. 

First, he heard a moan calling out his name. 

Second, the door wasn't locked. 

Third, when he opened it and stepped in, he was greeted by the sight of her, completely naked on the bed, with one hand between spread legs and the other on her breast. 

He didn't even register himself locking the door behind him, walking (more like stumbling) over next to the bed, and collapsing besides it with one elbow over the mattress. 

Going by the surprised squeak she lets out when she turns her head and spots him, she didn't, either.

"...You're real, right?"

Even as he was about to burst in his pants, he couldn't hold himself back from giving the usual shit-eating grin at that particular choice of words.

"No, this is Claude's ghost. He died back there fighting beasts and came back to haunt you while you were, uh, having some alone time."

Her expression contorted into the usual annoyance as well. 

"Nevermind, you're definitely real."

He chuckled softly before just barely remembering his original goal.

"Like I said, I just wanted to check if you were doing okay. The beast that attacked us earlier, it--"

"--uses aphrodisiacs on its prey. I know. I was trying to deal with it, in case you couldn't tell."

Silence. 

He mentally clung onto his (very thin) thread of sanity for dear life and somehow pieced a coherent sentence together, instead of reaching over to feel her soft skin like his hormones screamed at him to do.

"...I must have scared you, just walking in like this. At any rate, if you're okay, then, I can-- I'll leave you alone now."

"Claude..."

She inched closer with a frustrated, hungry look in her eyes, then grabbed his hand to place it over her breast. 

"...if you're seriously going to pretend you don't feel anything after seeing me like this, I swear I'll never forgive you."

And with that, his last bit of self-control flew out the window. 

\---

He didn't take her to be someone who would be so bold in bed (maybe it was just the aphrodisiac), but her hands kept going straight for his crotch area while their tongues mixed ungracefully and desperately. When she finally managed stick her hand inside his pants and rub a palm over the head, he got to mutter,

"You should probably let me undress fir...st..."

before reflexively thrusting and coming into her hand. 

She looked a little bit surprised, but (thankfully) not disappointed, as he began hardening again in no time.

While she took out her hand and examined the thick liquid coating it, he quickly stripped his top off and threw it somewhere off the bed and got about halfway with his pants before she locked her thighs around one of his own to grind into it. 

"Mmh, ah, Claude...!"

Cursing that clothes were a thing at all, he finished kicking off his pants, making the smallcloth follow suit, and thrusting his middle and ring fingers into her, almost all at the same time. He barely had to move his hands as she tightened even further and rode out another orgasm on her own, just moments after the last one. 

"Hah..."

She looked a little bit dazed afterwards, so he decided it was a good chance to go on the offensive, by adding his index finger and nibbling her neck. 

"W-wait, that's going to leave marks where people can see...!"

"It's okay if it's where people can't see, got it."

He moved lower to her small breasts, kissing and licking around one nipple as his free hand played with the other. She didn't protest, much to his surprise, and instead reached down to claw at his back, hard. And despite not being one of those types who got off to pain (probably), his cock began leaking pre-cum at the sensation of her nails drawing blood.

That aphrodisiac powder must really be working wonders, he thought, and let out a low groan.

His brain almost managed to ponder the yellow substance's strategic possibilities, but when she squealed and tightened into yet another climax, his inner monologue went from "maybe that beast was onto something," to "holy shit, I'm going to fuck her senseless even if it kills me tomorrow."

His attempt at repositioning was halted by a pair of small hands on his chest, however. 

"Sorry, Lys, I was being, ngh, hasty, wasn't I."

"I'm not a child, Claude, I can handle this much. But..."

Then she trailed one lower to lightly grip just below the head while curiously rubbing her thumbs over where he was leaking. 

"...how many times did you, you know, before you came here?"

"Who knows. Guess?"

She gave a cute little frown and gripped tighter, making his breath hitch. 

"Ah, it was about, three times."

Her hand, slick from a combination of both their bodily fluids, began pumping faster than he could think.

Somewhere _not_ on Getting-Your-Soul-Drained-Out-Of-Your-Dicktown, he could hear her voice say something like,

"Alright, so...four more, and we'll be even."

The craziest part was that he delivered, and then some.

\---  
\---

Byleth walked by the first floor dorms. 

Claude and Lysithea weren't at the dining hall earlier, and she knew as to why-- since she was the one who got them to strike down the beast together-- but she'd also confirmed that Claude wasn't in his own room at the second floor.

Which, considering how they acted around each other, narrowed down the possibilities, one of them being--

"Ah, Claude...! Harder, dammit...!"

Smack. 

"Oh, you're, hah, seriously trying to kill me here, aren't you, Lys?"

Thump.

"Hah, ngh, mmph...!"

Yep, they were fucking.

She'd have to wait until tomorrow (or possibly the day after tomorrow, depending on how exhausted they got) to congratulate them and internally laugh while their faces turned beet red. 

In the meanwhile, basking in her own genius matchmaking skills, involving the strategic use of sex pollen, was almost as fun. 

**Author's Note:**

> Important headcanon: Claude is one horny motherfucker once the actually-thinking-about-sex switch turns on, but Lysithea manages to top that, somehow.


End file.
